This was the first paper I wrote for my Independent Study Philosophy of Love class (and the first real philosophy paper I’ve ever written period). I eventually want to keep expanding on this paper and discuss minor point I bring up in full detail. At any rate, here it is:
Plato’s Ladder of Erotic Love
Love. Why is it that upon saying this word everyone immediately knows what I mean, yet we all define it differently? In this essay, I will be discussing one of the first recorded theories of love, Eros as discussed in the Symposium by Plato. More specifically, this theory comes from Socrates’ speech about his dialogues with Diotima. My main focus will be on the speeches recorded in Plato’sSymposium, as well as some reading from Soble’s Eros, Agape, and Philia. I will then make my own sort of assessment with some help from “Sorcerer Love: A Reading of Plato, Symposium, Diotima’s Speech” by Lucy Iragaruy.
Eros, the Platonic theory of Love, is a dialogue between Socrates and Diotima, Socrates’ mentor in the mysteries of love (Eros). Diotima begins by telling us the story of Eros, which is necessary to understand the theory of erotic love. In the Myth, Eros was conceived on the day celebrating Aphrodite’s birth when Penia (poverty), slept with a drunken Poros (wealth and resource). As a son of both a “have” and a “have-not,” he [Eros] is “always poor…he is tough and shriveled and shoeless and homeless, always lying on the dirt without a bed, sleeping at people’s doorsteps and in roadsides under the sky,” always in need. On his father’s side, “he is a schemer after the beautiful and the good; he is brave, impetuous, and intense, an awesome hunter, and always weaving snares…a lover of wisdom.” (Diotima)
With this in mind, Diotima then tells Socrates that not only is Eros not a great god, but he is neither beautiful nor good. Eros is a Daimon, a being between the gods and the mortals, a great spirit if you will. He is neither foolish nor wise, neither poor nor wealthy, neither ugly nor beautiful. To quote Sorcerer Love: “If Eros possessed all that he desired, he would desire no more. He must be lacking in order to desire still. But if he had no share in the beautiful and the good things, he could no longer desire them.”
Perhaps one of the most important things introduced in The Symposium is Plato’s theory of the Ladder of Love. We, with help from our lovers, ascend the Ladder, which, step by step, leads from the love of beautiful bodies, to the love of all physical beauty. We eventually ascend further to the love of beautiful habits and institutions to beautiful doctrines, and eventually to a sort of absolution of beauty, at which time we are one with the ultimate aspect of beauty.
The same goes for us mortals. We are on an ongoing quest to not only better ourselves, but to also gain a sort of immortality. By finding another and coming together, we have the ability to reproduce and spread our legacies; it is through our legacies that we obtain immortality, as my own interpretation says. So is immortality the top rung of the ladder? To avoid any confusion, I will start from the beginning and take you down what I believe to be Love’s path via narrative.
Meet Joey, a working middle class man in his late 20’s. He leads what he believes to be a good life: a good job, good friends, a nice house, etc. While at a party with his friends; Joey meets woman named Lisa. After a few drinks together, they really hit it off and end the night with some passion. When Joey wakes up the next morning, there is no sign of Lisa. In his mind, he just had a one night stand without the baggage, being the womanizer he was, he was perfectly content.
When we first meet Joey, we see that he is very content living a life without a romantic love. He has never felt it, so we can assume that he does not miss it; after all, how can you miss that which you have never experienced? At this point, one could say that Joey is only on the first rung of Plato’s Ladder. So I ask, is there a clear problem in living life like this?
He continued living life as normal after that night, until he ran into her at the store. After talking for a bit, they decided to go out for dinner, and eventually started dating, which turned into his first serious relationship.
At this point, one may presume that Joey has taken is first step up the ladder that is the path of love, this Platonic Ladder of Beauty. Although he hasn’t quite started climbing the ladder, one might say he is far better off than before. Now that he has had a minor taste of what romantic love is, he might be more prone to seeking it. One might compare his position to that of a philosopher who has a minor grasp of what it might mean to be wise; thus, he is on a quest for enlightenment.
Things between Joey and Lisa started like they always do. Everything was bright and happy and fairy tale-esque. However, as time went on, they had struggles here and there, but they got through them; Joey had some sacrifices to make, but in the long run, he was happy to make them. See, for Joey, he had always had a tough time remaining loyal; but with Lisa, things were different, he actually wanted things to work out between them.
As Joey makes more and more conscious decisions to sacrifice some of the old ideas that were the old Joey, and worked to become a new and better Joey, he starts making his way up his own erotic ladder. Perhaps by remaining loyal bodily, he is starting to look past the body and into the spirit; he is looking up the ladder and climbing one rung at a time, over a very large period of time, of course.
As time went on, Joey had come to realize that Lisa might be the one for him; he was definitely in love. No matter where he was, she was in his thoughts. He wanted to be with her forever, so he devised a plan to propose to her in the sweetest way. He took her out to a nice restaurant, and then as they were leaving, he blindfolded her and told her he had a surprise for her. He led her to the spot in the local park where the two ended their first date, took off her blindfold, got down on one knee, and proposed.
When one “gets butterflies” in his or her stomach, what does it mean? Why do we practice romanticism? Joey puts together a nice, heart-warming plan to propose to Lisa. Why might person x surprise person y with a rose and a box of chocolates on their anniversary? Are we as humans addicted to this “rush” of feelings that we get? This makes me wonder, when we do something nice for our loved ones, are we truly trying to be altruistic or do we do it for our own rush, this feeling of niceness, that we give ourselves upon doing something nice?
Lisa shakes her head, apologizes, and tells him that she doesn’t have the feelings for him that she once had. Needless to say, Joey is absolutely crushed. He had been with her for two years now and had started to become mentally dependent on her. What a rut. He still has the same job, the same house, same friends, yet he is nowhere near as happy as he was at the beginning of the story. Why is this?
The man, who had at one time not cared at all for women other than bodily urges, is now at the mercy of a single woman. He had tasted love, and is now stuck with its bittersweet flavor. Is it no longer possible for Joey to achieve immortality? He might perhaps achieve a lesser sense of immortality if he leaves behind a legacy worth remembering, but that is all.
So what would’ve happened if Lisa said yes? Hopefully Joey would ascend up Plato’s Ladder as he continues down life’s path. One might ask, “Okay, so he’s reached the top, now what?” Earlier, I referenced the final rung representing the ultimate aspect of beauty. What does this mean exactly? Let us take some time to explore this idea.
He has transcended to a stage in which he sees and appreciates all forms of beauty. One might say he is the epitome of a worldly person; one who sees the good in everything. He no longer frets over life’s trivial issues, nor does he ever truly lose sight of his lover. She is always with him, and he with her; if not physically, then in spirit, the two are one.
And that, my friend, is love. Or at the very least, what it ought to be. If you wish to live forever, alongside a loved one, follow this path of erotic love. Even if you are not able to ascend to the highest state of love, you will better yourself as a person in your attempt to do so.
Mimes and Martinis 